It is humbling to consider just how quickly and how easily we poor fragile human beings can become frightened, terrified, and completely out of sorts before one can say, "boo!" Not too long ago I developed a slight medical issue and I was afraid. As the pain and discomfort increased, I was a great wimp and started to imagine the possibility of my demise! But there are actually many reasons for us to become frightened as we consider the day and age in which we live. There is an ever-flowing stream of media reports on the most violent and sickening crimes constantly taking place in our country. Our moral compass as a nation seems to be pointing directly towards hell. And in many cases, it is a terrifying state of affairs. My family lived in The Woodlands, TX from 2002 through 2010. Recently, someone approached a women holding her infant baby right outside The Woodlands. The criminal grabbed the baby away from its mother, shot the mother (who eventually died trying to save her baby), and drove off with the baby. This is sickening...this is terrifying.

When the first disciples first saw Jesus risen from the dead, the word says that they were terrified (Luke 24:37), or "startled and frightened" because they thought they were seeing a ghost! This same reaction is used to describe their reaction when they saw Christ walking on water (Mt 14:26 & Mk 6:49), and Jesus warned them not to panic this way when they would hear about signs and warnings of the end (Lk 21:9). That is to say, there are many things in this world that may cause us to be terrified and upset. Ever since sin and death came into the world -- and again -- it doesn't take much to rattle us!

However, Christ came "among them" (v 36) -- those first terrified disciples -- not to terrify, but to help them! Jesus was quite specific in what He did to eliminate their fear; quite exacting when it came to instilling comfort. In fact, what He gave was believing joy (v 41)! He showed His disciples His hands and His feet (vss 39-40), because it was through these that Christ testified to that which flowed from those holy wounds to save them! But to be alive while doing it, meant that He was truly the Lord of Life and in fact, the Great I AM!

As you know "I AM" is the Name of God as revealed in Exodus 3 and Exodus 6. When Christ appeared here in Luke 24, He actually said, "I AM myself" or "I AM He"...the Great "I AM" was in their midst. Not to overwhelm, not to terrify, but to bless. God had come to bless His people; to comfort His people; and to teach them that His victory was now being shared with His disciples.

Sometimes we are tempted to envy these first-century apostles: "Oh, they received such glorious signs!" But dear Christian, you continue to receive the God-appointed, Word-confirmed signs for your faith as well. You have offered to you the blood of Christ which flowed from those holy hands and feet when you gather for the Holy Supper! You continue to receive The Lord's Supper which is the fruit of those Holy Wounds of Jesus poured out for the forgiveness of sins; and you get the fruit of Christ's victory: the creation of His HOLY CHURCH in which the members of Christ love each other and comfort one another. "I AM" continues to show Himself to comfort you!

Of these 21st century signs we have great witnesses who have spoken about their great value:

Ignatius wrote in his epistle to the Ephesians (ANF, volume 1, 57): in reference to Holy Communion: "the medicine of immortality, and the antidote which prevents us from dying, but a cleansing remedy driving away evil, [which causes] that we should live in God through Jesus Christ."

C.S. Lewis wrote in The Weight of Glory: "Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbour is the holiest object presented to your senses. If he is your Christian neighbour, he is holy in almost the same way, for in him also Christ...the glorifier and the glorified, Glory Himself, is truly hidden (19)."

The signs appointed are still for His people to assure us that "I AM" is in our midst...perfect love has driven away fear. We too may live in believing joy!

In Christ,

Dr. Espinosa

The first disciples were overcome with fear after their Master and Teacher, Jesus, had been crucified. Their fear was evident by virtue of their hiding out. The text in John 20 uses "doors" (plural). They were hiding out and were locked away deep within a building with a bolted door, and with an inner room that was also secure. This was high security in play. They knew the routine. While Christ had suffered a miscarriage of justice and had been falsely accused and unjustly murdered, they were now known as enemies of the state; the disciples of the leader of sedition (again, so went the false accusation). As His disciples they could very well suffer the same fate. The Jewish leaders had gone to Pilate right after Christ had been buried: "Sir, we remember how that imposter said, while he was still alive, 'After three days I will rise.' Therefore order the tomb to be made secure until the third day, lest his disciples go and steal him away and tell the people, 'He has risen from the dead,' and the last fraud will be worse than the first (Matthew 27:63-64)." The disciples were held suspect. In other words they were in trouble and the One who could have protected them was now dead...at least that is what they believed.

And that belief is what still plagues us. We Christians of course have a great advantage compared to the first disciples as they were in the scene described above. We have their later witness. Christ was seen, and heard, and touched. Christ is risen! And yet...we behave as if He were still dead. That is what our sin does to us, and it is of course pathetic.

The proof of our unbelief that still confronts us is our living in fear like the first disciples. We hide behind locked doors. Oh, perhaps our doors are different, but they are there. One way that they are there is in our confrontation with sin. We all struggle with sin, because we all have the sinful nature which remains even after conversion to the Lord Jesus Christ; even after becoming a new creation. But there is a vast difference between experiencing the battle between the two natures (our sinful nature and born-again nature), and just plain giving in to the sinful nature without repentance and without faith in the Risen Lord Jesus. We "hide behind our locked doors" living in fear whenever we act as if Christ is not alive to help us in our confrontation with sin. When we say, "Oh what's the point?! I must live as if my Savior is dead and just give into the temptation!" I am not saying that Christians do not sin...we do...I am not saying that our battle against the flesh isn't constant...it is...but what I am saying is that to live in fear as if to release our faith in the Living Savior, treating Him as if He were still dead is to be the perfect position to give up the battle, give up the fight, give up repentance, and give in to sin as master. This is not living in faith in the Risen Christ!

We live in fear also when it comes to prayer, worship, service, and witness. If we live in fear, then why pray? The Lord is not really there. Why worship? The Lord is not really there. Why serve others? We may very well run out of resources...after-all the Lord will not be there to replenish them! Why witness? The Lord is not really there. When we give in to fear, we act and live as if Christ was not risen!

What will save us from this sad state? The answer is in our Gospel in John 20. Jesus did not wait for those first disciples, nor does He wait for us, to pull themselves up by their own boot straps! He took and takes the initiative, He enacts grace, and He comes to us in our helpless state. And when He comes He speaks peace, but when He speaks peace He does not do it as if to wish for or hope for the best for us, but He speaks peace in such a fashion as to GIVE peace or IMPART peace -- God's peace -- to you and to me! And that peace is directly connected to the showing of His wounds. The wounds that said two things to those original disciples shaking in fear:

1. I WAS dead, but look it really is ME and I am alive! I AM RISEN! I conquered death! And dear Christian, if Jesus conquered DEATH, then what problem confronting you -- causing you to fear -- is worse than what Jesus has already defeated?!

2. Those wounds are the basis for our peace. Those wounds mean that it is true: YOU ARE FORGIVEN; the blood of Jesus really was shed to FORGIVE you ALL your sins and now as the RISEN LORD, He speaks authoritatively to this truth: You are forgiven your sins...you are right with God. God's peace really IS yours!

It is time for us in this Easter season especially to cast off fear. The Living Lord is with us. Let us break out of our closed, locked spaces and know that the Risen Christ is leading us to turn from sin, to pray, to worship, to serve, and to witness empowered through His unending and death-defeating LIFE. You may live this way because Christ is Risen and His peace is yours!

In Christ,

Dr. Espinosa

Dear Christians,

Dear Christian Friends,

Isaiah 25:8 proclaims, "He will swallow up death forever; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from all faces, and the reproach of his people he will take away from all the earth, for the Lord has spoken." This is why St. Ambrose says that for Christians death is no longer bitter, but sweet. Eusebius of Caesarea wrote, "[Christ] pursued [death] from behind and drove him [death] on, trodden under his feet and fleeing, and he burst the eternal gates of his dark realms and made a road of return back again to life for the dead [referring to us, dead in our trespasses and sins, Eph. 2:1].” (ACC, X, 167)

I am so thankful that faith in the resurrected Christ has both tremendous practical impact on the way we live, and provides for us solid evidence for a reliable foundation for believing.

Two former parishioners come to mind in particular in terms of how the resurrection impacts practical living, both of whom are in heavenly glory today: Dr. Mitch Matthis and Mary Ann Cota, R.N.

When Mitch found out about his advanced stage with cancer, he wanted to be right with God. The Lord granted him some amazing personal experiences that essentially got his attention. He then wanted something solid to sink his teeth into going beyond his spiritual experiences. He had me over and we started catechesis in the faith which he was extremely excited for. Mitch was a brilliant scientiest and he appreciated the historical nature of the Christian faith. For example, the accounts of our Resurrected Lord are related to the "two E's" which Dr. Gary Habermas is noted for teaching about.

The resurrection accounts are based both on EARLY testimony (in relation to the actual resurrection event), putting that proclamation only a few years after the actual event so that even the enemies of Christ were living during this proclamation. There was no room for fabrication in the face of contemporary hostile witnesses. Which leads to the second "E": EYE-WITNESSES. And eye-witnesses of the resurrected Lord who gave their very lives for the testimony of the truth that Jesus defeated death. This is the quality of reliable history; it is the kind of history that we rely on every day of our lives. Christ's resurrection is not the stuff of mythology.

Given this foundation of faith, Mitch was transformed. He faced his impending physical death with the confidence that he would not ultimately die, but ultimately live. This completely impacted the way he lived on a day-to-day basis. Even while dealing the physical pain, he knew a joy that came from God. On the day he died, I held his hand and sang, "How Great Thou Art." He was full of confidence in how to face death...as that which Christ conquered. When his wife and mother held him in their arms, he died with faith in the resurrected Savior!

Mary Ann Cota wanted to get married. For some people receiving the news of terminal cancer, marriage plans would have been called off. Not so for Mary Ann! She knew that her Resurrected Lord gave her life to live each and every day and a life that is lasting even beyond the grave. Such life strives to make the most of life every, single day. She got married, she and her husband celebrated life, and towards the end when I came over to her house to give her Holy Communion, she held onto her crucifix and stared into the face of death defiantly. She knew Job's words that she would not die, but live. This is the way she lived and this is way she faced death, not as bitter, but as sweet.

These practical accounts on how to live lead me to consider the rock solid foundation of this faith:

1. Jesus truly died. The evidence is overwhelming from the Roman flogging, to the crucifixion, to the spear in his side. Why is this important? Because it elliminates ideas about Christ passing out, fainting, or "swooning." There is no room for such ludicrous hypothesis. He died, this we know.

2. Jesus was buried. Why is this significant? When I travel up north to my hometown Delano, CA, I like to visit the grave markers of my deceased relatives. I can go up to my grandfather's place of burial and see my name, "Alfonso Espinosa," I can go to my uncle's grave and see my name again, "Alfonso Espinosa," I can go to see the marker of my big brother I never met who died long before I was born as an infant, "Robert Steven Espinosa." And I know exactly where my dear father is -- of blessed and holy memory -- and his marker that says, "Robert C. Espinosa."

The point is that people knew where Jesus was buried and everyone had a vested interest in ensuring that this information was accurate. The Jews wanted to know and did know so as to resist any monkey business that would lead his disciples to claim a resurrection that didn't occur. Indeed, if Christ's enemies had stolen his body, they would have produced it to put an end to their hated claim that Christ arose! The followers of Christ did not steal his body either. They had nothing to gain, but the loss of everything in their lives...in fact most of them were martyred for this faith. A fabrication or lie does not explain furthermore how these frightened disciples and especially the terribly skeptical ones like James and Paul became fierce warriors for the Gospel proclamation unafraid of putting their lives on the line for what they knew beyond a shadow of a doubt was true and that which would lead to their death.

The Romans had every motivation to curtail controversy and potential riot. No one had reason to steal Christ's body...but this we know: we know that He was buried, and we know where He was buried, and we know -- historically -- that His body was no longer in that tomb. This is fact.

3. Going back to the second "E" above is important at this juncture. What happened next? Did you know that the Gospels record not just one or two instances of the resurrected Christ appearing, but twelve (12) and these over a period of forty (40) days! To simply see His image was insufficient for these disciples. Thomas in John 20 did more than see Christ, but He touched his body where the nails were. My favorite account is when Christ had breakfast with some of his disciples on the sea shore and in that account Christ Himself at the fish the disciples had brought in. And -- as John Warwick Montgomery says -- "ghosts don't eat fish!"

The evidence goes on. The Christian Church grew to become the largest world religion for a reason; and major cultural institutions were transformed for a reason. The quality of what is true has these effects, the quality of the One who has swallowed death itself has these effects!

With all these things considered, we are called to live according to the impact of His risen life. We can face uncertain days with absolute certainty: our Risen Lord lives to hold us through life, to bless us, and to make everything in our lives blessed through the sweetness of His swallowing up death!

Bless you dear Christians!

Dr. Espinosa

Dear Christian,

Dear Christians,